CHAPTER THE NINTH

 

Age Discrimination

 

Many years ago, when I entered religious life, it was thought that I was too young and should probably wait to enter the Franciscan Order. After a year of college I once again applied to enter and was accepted at the age of 19. Of course, there was still a mistrust of my youth. I was received with the stipulation that I would probably be doing two years of postulancy before I would be considered for novitiate. So, longing to follow the call upon my heart, I entered. I thought to myself, “Better to be a postulant for two years, live the life, rather than spend another year out here in the world”.

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Not only did I not do two years of postulancy, but out of the 10 of us only 4 went to novitiate. Of us 4 novices I was the only one to profess my first vows. At the age of 21, having done one year as a postulant and another as a novice, I placed my hands into the hands of my superior and made my vows of poverty, chastity and obedience. Although the road before me was long and took various turns, I have never regretted entering at 19 and professing at 21. Maybe that’s why I don’t really get those that put off the call until later.

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“Putting off” the call can be quite dangerous to one’s vocation. Not only does it put off the workings of God’s grace, but it can also endanger the vocation itself. I have even heard of some very poorly trained vocation directors telling young men to go and “experience” the world first. They actually advise them to go out, get a job and an apartment, date and so on. Instead of striking while the iron is hot they are sent out to cool off. Many vocations have been lost because of such advice. I often wonder if these vocation directors are not trying to live vicariously through the vocations that they send out into the world.

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This bias against youthful vocations can even be found in some more traditionally sound religious communities. These communities have a lot of young men or women interested, but because of their worries of youth, they send them out to do their college first. Now, that may even seem most prudent to the wisest men. However, there are two things with this with which I have a problem. First, one of the real reasons that they want the young vocation to do college first is because they don’t want to spend time and money on this young vocation and then watch them leave the community. The second problem that I have seen over and over again is young people going to college in order to enter this or that community, then after four years of college, they are 30-70 thousand dollars in debt. They’ll spend the next five years trying to pay their college loans and won’t enter religious life until their 30 years old. The worst part is that some of these communities that send people out to school won’t even help them pay off the debt.

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On the other side of the spectrum is this magical cut off age. Take a peek through a thousand religious communities and one thing that you will inevitably find is “over 35 need not apply”. There is a real bias against older vocations. Some communities are a bit nicer about it and will close you out at 40. I’m not talking about these crazy wild orders. I’m talking about the traditional, habit wearing, rosary praying communities. Somewhere and somehow these communities decided that older vocations are just plain old no good. Quite frankly, that attitude is contrary to the traditions of our Church.

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I feel very free in saying that such an attitude and disposition is contrary to tradition because the history of our Church is filled with saints who were “older”. Take St. Rita as an

example. She had been married, had children and she did just fine as an Augustinian nun. Even our own country in the U.S. clings to older vocations in St. Elizabeth Ann Seton, a widow and mother, who founded a religious order of sisters. In our own Franciscan family, we have the Venerable Ortalana, mother of St. Clare of Assisi. What’s wrong with our culture that it has so influenced traditional religious orders into believing that an older vocation is unwanted.

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The mentality comes from the thought that an older vocation is more difficult to form. They are “set in their ways”. I have heard this said, but I have not seen it to be true. My experience has been that an older vocation fares better in religious life than someone in their twenties. An older vocation has been through the storms of life. Life has taught them that they have to work hard, they have to be generous and they must be pliable and formable if they wish to survive in the world. What I learned in my early twenties, an older vocation brings to religious life with them. To put it quite plainly, an older vocation has been through the struggles of life and has learned to roll with the punches. They know how not to make a mountain out of a molehill. Age has given them the wisdom not to sweat the small stuff.

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St. Francis never had a problem with older vocations and so, following his example and express will in the Rule of 1223, we have no problem with older vocations. My guess is that St. Francis had no problem with an older vocation because God doesn’t. God did not say to the 80 year old Moses at the burning bush “Would have loved to send you to Egypt and rescue the people, too bad you’re so old!” NO! Abraham is 97 and Sarah is 87 when Isaac is born. I can go on and on. But I think you get my point. God does not limit Himself to an age bracket. I firmly believe that communities with age limits have unknowingly embraced a culture that teaches that the “old” have nothing to offer society. By putting on false age brackets religious orders have unknowingly put God in a box and told Him not to call anyone over 40. And, they have also unknowingly told those over 40 that they have no full self-gift to offer to God. They tell these people, unknowingly and unintentionally, that they are spent and only have volunteer work to give to God. Nonsense!!

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What if someone enters community at 65 and dies at 70? Don’t those 5 years mean something to God? Is this person not allowed to stand before God in judgment and say, “I gave my all in the end”? Their consecration of themselves to God does count! Even if they are in vows only for an hour of a day, it has worth.

Let’s face the fact that we now live in a culture that leaves people without God for many years. Or, people are confused about faith and their calling. They may have spent much time in life being lost and confused. Often, after spending 40 years in dissipation, people finally discover the awesome love of Christ and feel that call to give Him their all.

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Please, if you are over 40, don’t think for one minute that you are too old for God! On the contrary, you are never too old. How else should you spend the rest of your life? What else do you expect to get out of life? You know God is calling you. Do not let these well-intentioned but misinformed groups turn you away because of your age. I believe in the public sector they call that “age discrimination”. Don’t give up! If a community won’t take down that false age barrier, then take that as a sign from God that that community is not for you. Seek out orders that will open their arms to a late vocation. I mean this even to those of you who are widowed, annulled or just plain late in getting around to your discernment. God knows no age. God’s timing is His will. If He wills to call you now, at your age, don’t give up the search!

I really pray that someday we will be freed from the utilitarian mentality that makes us value people by what they have to offer to society. That mentality that says, “what use will they be?” What a horrible way to view the human person. Yet, even the most orthodox of religious and priests have it so deep within them they don’t even realize they are doing it. We really have to get back to seeing people again. And not just “people”, but “persons”, seeing each individual person for who they truly are. Like the good Lord, we must do our best and see the beauty in each person and bring that out. Even if they are over 40. Maybe, the only good that they will be able “to do” is suffer. If that person, who suffers in later years, understands the dignity and mystery of human suffering, and comprehends and knows how to offer that suffering as a “sweet smelling sacrifice”, then they are more “useful” to the order than their greatest preacher, teacher or evangelist.

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Those of you who are young and feel discriminated against because of your youthfulness and lack of college degree, remember what scripture says, “say not ‘I am too young’”. Also, call to mind that Mary was around 13 years old when she conceived Jesus. John the Apostle was around 15 years old when he followed Christ. St. Paul said to the young Bishop Timothy “let no one look down on you because of your youth”. If you believe you are called to follow Christ, know that you need to move on that now! There is nothing this world has to offer you to “experience” that will make you more faithful to Christ. Recall how persistent St. Therese of Lisieux was, going even to the Pope to enter the Carmelites young. By her perseverance, she won over the heart of the Church and entered Carmel at the tender age of 15.

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I realize that people are going to want you to date first. You may even want to do that first yourself. However, having dated is not a prerequisite for religious life or sanctity. Padre Pio never dated! And St. Maximillian Kolbe entered a High School seminary. They both did just fine without having gotten into the dating scene. Also, if you feel and believe that Jesus wants you to first go to college, praise God! Do it. However, if not, then seek out a community that will take you in a.s.a.p.

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May we all realize that age is not the problem. Stubbornness of heart, selfish spirit, an unwillingness to be formed are the things that break a vocation. These occur at any age and are more common in the young than the old. Whatever age we may be, we must open our hearts to be generous, merciful, selfless, formable and, most necessary, humble. Every soul at any age is capable of this interior disposition.

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Lectio for Chapter the Tenth

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John 1:35-42

The next day again John was standing with two of his disciples; and he looked at Jesus as he walked, and said, “Behold, the Lamb of God!” The two disciples heard him say this, and they followed Jesus. Jesus turned, and saw them following, and said to them, “What do you seek?” And they said to him, “Rabbi” (which means Teacher), “where are you staying?” He said to them, “Come and see.” They came and saw where he was staying; and they stayed with him that day, for it was about the tenth hour. One of the two who heard John speak, and followed him, was Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother. He first found his brother Simon, and said to him, “We have found the Messiah” (which means Christ). He brought him to Jesus. Jesus looked at him, and said, “So you are Simon the son of John? You shall be called Cephas” (which means Peter).